Zach's Office Chair of Rage: Visa

I'm sitting in my office chair, thoroughly pissed at a certain credit card company. I also know other people who share my sentiment.

You've probably seen those commercials for Visa check cards that show the well-oiled machine of capitalism chugging along with people effortlessly and quickly completing their transactions by swiping their debit cards. But wait, who's that asshole that's writing a check?! The flawlessly choreographed symphony of shopping grinds to a sudden halt when the poor bastard at the counter fumbles with cash or tears out a check. Then, they either continue their transaction like a consumer with balls would do, or notice their monetary misstep and pull out the VISA CARD.

Okay Visa, it's time you got a little taste of my rage. I'm one of those people that uses cash on a daily basis. What kind of damn problem to you have with cash holders. Yes, I know that your commercials are an exaggeration, but they are very offensive to those of us who enjoy using money.

Oh, and one more thing. I do admit that I use a debit card. A MASTERCARD debit card! Stick that up your pipe and smoke it, bitch.

New Monopoly Uses Debit Cards, All Educational Value Lost

I was watching TV today, and a commercial appeared that left me in complete shock.

There was this girl, playing Monopoly with her family, and she was accepting payment for her father's purchase, WITH A DEBIT CARD. That's right. The new Monopoly Electronic Banking Edition gets rid of the paper, and brings in plastic cards that are programmed using a card reader. No more counting stupid money and learning how to be a responsible consumer! Next thing we know, they'll be adding credit cards, and chance cards that read: "Uh oh! Your adjustible rate mortgage on your highest valued property sextupled! You must pawn your game piece to pay it off. Then you must steal your friends game piece. You get caught. Go to jail."

Wow... I don't think they can squeeze that on the card. What fun.