Die-Hard Conservative? High School Football Fan? Then Fox Hilites Is For You!

Bible belt uber-conservative football fans now have a high school football site with their favorite news source's name plastered all over!

Fox is ready to exploit and over-hype all of your favorite high school teams and players in hopes of monetary gain. Users can post videos and commentary onto their favorite team's custom page. Then, out of nowhere, Giraldo Rivera will burst onto the screen, drawing the opposing teams play in the sand pit, thus spoiling any strategy or surprise to the game, and continuing his slow decline into oblivion.

Still wanna look? Sure.

The Weekender: School's In

Well, this will be the last weekend of me and Justin's summer vacation. We'll be pretty busy with school and everything, but we'll try our best to keep on truckin' quality content your way. We leave you this weekend with quite a delicious morsel for your visual enjoyment.

Patrick Melton, of Nobody Likes Onions fame, has cranked out a hilarious new video podcast with his fresh new character, Kyle Majestic. Kyle is a technology guru, with experience dating back to the early 90's. He's here to help answer your internet and general tech questions, and he likes to do it KYLE STYLE. Enjoy.




Kyle Majestic Tech Show - Show 1 from Patrick Melton and Vimeo.

New iPods To Be Released, Nano Pulls a Louie Anderson

Rumors are spinning about once again as another Apple press conference looms near. The new iPods are thought to be released on September 5th, which could include a slightly more, um, portly iPod Nano.

The rumored iPod Nano is shorter than it's current iteration, but is considerably chubbier, and rounder around the edges. Pictures have leaked on the interwebs of this new physique, only to be forcefully taken down by Apple Legal. The opinions of those who have spied the new iPod haven't all been positive, so say the least. Many people are calling it a step back from past versions.

I would love to put up a pic, but I'll pass on legal action for now.

Google To Kill Off Video Store

Now that they own YouTube, Google is finally giving up on their paid video service. On the 15th, they will shut down all operations and make ALL videos unwatchable. Yes, even the ones you paid for, fair and square. As a parting gift, Google is giving away $2 Google Checkout coupons to those who purchased videos on the site.

Personally, I don't blame them. Sure, the $2 bucks is kind of a useless gesture, but they'll probably be saving a lot more than that by killing off YouTube's retarded cousin.

As First iPhone Bills Come In, Postal Service Enjoys Massive Profits

A writer for ars technica just got his first iPhone bill in. No, it wasn't the price that floored him, for that was probably reasonable, but the sheer size of the physical bill itself was mind-boggling.

His bill was 52 pages long, with every page printed on both sides, which adds up to 104 pages. Each page excruciatingly describes every single data transfer the iPhone made in the past billing period. The bill even came in its own oversized envelope! Don't believe me? LOOK!

Slash Those Prices

This week Microsoft finally announced a price reduction for their ever-popular-yet-notoriously-expensive gaming console, the Xbox 360. A price drop of around $50 will be effective for each package available:

• Core: now $279.99
• Premium: now $349.99
• Elite: now $449.99
  

This was an expected move from Microsoft, seeing as how rival Sony just recently dropped the price of their console: the PS3. Sony wisely chose to lower the price of their 60GB model from $599 to $499 in response to "lower-than-expected sales of the console."

Microsoft hopes that the price cut will open the wallets... er... I mean minds of previously unreached consumers, resulting in a much sought-after increase in sales. As for me, I just bought mine off of eBay.

For more information, see Xbox.com.

New iMacs Out Today, Price Jacked Up

The rumors have ended up being true. Not only was a new Apple keyboard released today, but so was a new iMac to match.

These suckers look pretty good. Made of aluminum, glass and black plastic it gives a darker, more somber feel to the Mac. Guess you could say the iMac is in its Temple of Doom phase. The 17" model was killed off, and now only 20" and 24" models remain. The entry price has also went up to $1199; too rich for my cheapskate blood. They're also loaded with Core 2 Duo processors, high-end ATI graphics, and other goodies.

The Mac Mini also got an upgrade, although not cosmetically, today as well. The only present it received was Core 2 Duo processors and 1 gig of RAM standard.

A good day for Apple.

The Weekender: Stupid, Yet Awesome Commercials

We leave you this weekend with a nice treat from the great folks at The Consumerist. I read this blog almost every day, and whenever they roll out a new "Great Moment in Commercial History," it's time for celebration. Here's a few of my favorites.

This is from The Mattress Ranch. You must assume that if a store considers itself a ranch full of mattresses, you're in for a wild ride. A crazed old man invites you to come see him at the fair, and then dances as if having a convulsion. Not only is he dancing, but so are cute kids and a creepy enlarged likeness of the old man! The Serta sheep ain't got crap on this.



Now we call on the credit pimp to get you in a car. No credit? Bad credit? No problem! We'll get you financed in a '98 Oldsmobile Silhouette financed over 128 months!



Detroit isn't only the home of makers of overpriced cars, but it's also home to transvestite exterminators!



This one isn't too exciting until the end. Fast forward if you like, you won't be missing much.



The way this man pronounces Christmas is worth suffering blindness after seeing his demonic grin.



I would put more, but that would just defeat the purpose of visiting The Consumerist.

Turn Old Crap Gadgets Into Cash With SecondRotation

If you, like me, are tired of dealing with dirty Frenchmen on eBay, you'll love selling your old tech crap to Second Rotation. This is a great business model. You look up your product, tell them its condition, and they'll give you a price and shipping label. Throw your product in a box, stick on the label, and wave bye-bye. I've checked their quotes on a few gadgets, and they're not that bad. They offer just slightly less than they think they can make on eBay or another shopping site. It's simple, easy, and can make getting rid of your ugly-ass SonyEricsson cell phone all the more easier.